Operation Dirt Digging

I’m not exactly a spy. Nor can I gather anything on a world wide conspiracy. Well, except one. The Illuminati. These guys have dirt like none other. Unfortunately for them, recently the leader and I got into a fight, and the leader came up a day late and a head short.

So my only choice was gone.

Until I realized…

There were bigger Fish to fry.

Bigger Super powered fish!

Time to dig up some dirt on Superman. The easiest way to do that? Shift into Supergirl. Which meant I had to find Supergirl and steal some of her hair or something. So, I went through the old rooms here… Finally I found some blonde hair, and I grabbed it, most appreciatively and I morphed into- Well, whoever it was, wasn’t Supergirl.



When I exited the room, and walked to the Computer, I clicked it on, hit twenty buttons and finally said “Hello?”

Johnathan Jones, The Martian Manhunter answered, “Rima?” He asked.

“I know not of what you speak of chico,” I responded.

“Rima, are you okay, you’ve been gone since the 80’s? You’re looking good though.”

“Thanks?”

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m looking for Superman.”

“He’s at the Daily Planet, ask for Clark Kent.”

Wait a second! Superman has an Alias? And it’s a reporter?! This is good dirt!

“Thanks Johnny.” I responded, and I jumped outside. As soon as I did, there was an Elephant waiting. Not an Elephant I made nor Summoned, he was just waiting there for me.

I hopped on, and road downtown. Surprisingly enough the people didn’t care an Elephant was in traffic with them. I arrived at the Daily Planet and went inside. At the receptionist desk I got, “Hello. I bet you’re here for Clark? He’s up stairs.”

I went to the elevator, and I waited in it. A man was staring at me, “Take a picture chico it will last longer.”

- -

Once I got to Clark’s Office, I opened the door, and he smiled, “Rima! It’s good to see you! How have you been, you look great, as young as ever.”

“Superman?” I asked.

He laughed, “Shh- Remember? That’s a secret… You’re looking really good, do you remember that time we went up the Amazon to stop Starfire from changing all of the albino dolphins into killing machines?”

“Uhm-“

He raised his eyebrow, “Thousand Faces – Get out. Out Out Out!!!!”

And that’s how I got kicked out of the Daily Planet.

- - -

When I returned to the Hall of Justice. I found Anakin Skywalker, still in the form of Rima, and I yelled, “Anakin! Guess what?!”

“What, yo?”

“I found some Dirt on Superman!”

“Really? What is it?”

“By day he pretends to be Clark Kent, Mild Mannered Reporter!”

“Chick-Yo… We all knew that already… I think everybody in the world knows that… Way to go there Wild Girl.”

I sighed heavily. That was a waste of my energy… There is just no dirt on Superman. I walked back to my room, and tripped on a Box labeled, “Superman – Secrets” I just didn’t care…

Find some dirt on Superman – Failure.